tchncs

How to bring friends to a non-commercial social network?


There is a conversation that periodically resurfaces among participants in non-commercial social networks such as Friendica and Hubzilla. (By “non-commercial social networks” I mean most of the social networks that are part of what has come to be called the fediverse – but not all of them, because, especially since 2023, we've been seeing texts on blogs and in the mainstream media mentioning commercial social networks – such as Threads and Bluesky – as part of the fediverse). The conversation I'm referring to revolves around the difficulty of “bringing friends over”, getting them to use a non-commercial social network.

After some time thinking about what could explain that difficulty, I share my ideas below. I only arrived at the main ideas here at the end of a very long and rich conversation on this subject with a friend I met on one of these social networks. I thank him. Since these ideas were not tested in any way, for now they are only hypothetical ideas, really. In a few months the last section of this article will be updated.

An initial fact First, something that seems to be an initial fact: it is very difficult for a person, who has been using a social network for several years (having well established connections/relationships with friends and other people there) to be interested in opening an account on any other social network where their friends and acquaintances are not present. (This is part of the power of the well known network effect).

And, in a way, it does not matter if that “new” social network is a non-commercial social network or not. Many people think that this difficulty is intrinsically related to the non-commercial social networks (related to the need to 1) choose one of these social networks and then 2) choose one of its instances to open the account), but, based on my experience, I believe this is a wrong conception. So, below I talk about non-commercial social networks, but these thoughts, I think, are valid for any social networks where people's friends and acquaintances are not present.

First question: Why is it so difficult to get a person interested in (and “inside”) a non-commercial social network?

This happens, I believe, because of a conjunction of six factors (not all of them necessarily present in all people):

a) Since there is no network effect attracting the person to the new social network (apart from a single person/friend calling, as is often the case), the person does not see enough “value” in that possible move.

b) Since people don't see publicity about non-commercial social networks (unfortunately, advertising is also a resource that shapes our world), don't see other people entering these networks (or saying they are entering them), people don't feel this perspective as real.

c) Many people have difficulty understanding what a non-commercial social network is and how it works. This is because 1) after two decades of use, they are more than used to the same way of working as the various commercial social networks they use or have used (they are even resigned (or anesthetized) to the abuses committed by those companies), and so they find it difficult to understand something that really appears as a different paradigm; 2) even if the person is a teenager and has only recently started using commercial social networks, non-commercial networks will still cause some upset, because they demand a more active and conscious position from the person using them, in which you make choices (first the social network, then your site/instance) and then change position: you stop being just a “user” of an industrial service and become a “participant” in a context that is constantly being constructed by this community of participants.

d) People perceive and feel the possibility of joining a non-commercial social network (which, at the same time, they confuse/equate with abandoning the commercial social networks they already use) as an existential threat. They have already reached the point of identifying their online presences in these networks with their own identity, and therefore deal with that possibility as if they were dealing with the prospect of a (symbolic) death.

e) The subjective movement of dismissing that invitation or call (of joining a non-commercial social network) gains the powerful aid and force of the convenience factor. The person tells himself/herself that it would be a great inconvenience and a huge task to leave the commercial social networks (again, when this is not requested), besides the social and even professional damage that this could bring... and, in this way, the person dismisses the subject from his/her mind.

f) Many people are conditioned (and addicted) by the over-stimulation of the slot machine-like interfaces of commercial social networks; and often, when they eventually open an account on a non-commercial social network (which doesn't have those addictive strategies), they experience great strangeness, which in itself can lead to disinterest in the social network.

Second question: But as there are millions of people using non-commercial social networks, who, then, are these people who have become interested in joining these networks?

I think they are people who have some (or all) of these characteristics:
a) they were and are outraged at the various actions and modes of exploitation and subjective enslavement carried out by commercial social networks;

b) they enjoy the novelty of using and exploring a new social network, because they feel that it's fun to do new and unfamiliar things;

c) they don't have their sense of comfort – convenience – triggered or threatened by the prospect of building from scratch a new online presence in a new (and different) social network;

d) they have not made the subjective movement of identifying their online presences/profiles in commercial social networks with their own identities;

e) they have technical knowledge in the area of software development and/or computer science in general.

I think it is possible that the bigger the number of these five characteristics a person has, the more likely the person will be interested in – or feel attracted to – a non-commercial social network. Note: only e) is an objective characteristic (and one that most people don't have) – the other four are all subjective characteristics (we don't know in advance who are the people who have those ones).

In other words, I think the difficulty of bringing friends is related to:

  1. lack of “references” about the “new” social network (friends and acquaintances don't use it and don't comment; there are (almost) no comments in the media about it; there is no publicity);
  2. lack of understanding or insufficient understanding of what a non-commercial social network is and how they work;
  3. lack of understanding about the reasons and advantages of using a non-commercial social network;
  4. fear of disconnection with friends (even when we don't tell people to stop using commercial social networks);
  5. convenience (avoidance of effort/work: find and connect with friends again and rebuild one's personal/professional network. And... most people will not be there (yet) – the network effect again...);
  6. unwillingness or lack of curiosity to learn new things (how to use the new network) – partially produced by the convenience factor;
  7. the fact that users of commercial social networks have been conditioned to an experience of over-stimulation and “rewards” by the interfaces of those networks.

So, if things are really like that, then it is practically impossible to bring people into “social networks (where the person has no friends)”. And then the set of non-commercial social networks is simply a place that “naturally attracts” people with a certain profile, with certain characteristics: those a), b), c), d) and e) mentioned above (which probably contributes to a certain homogeneity in the profiles of people who are currently using those networks).

So, if you invite a friend or another person to use a non-commercial social network, whether or not they use it will depend, I think, more on who they are (their personal/subjective characteristics) and less on the “quality” of your invitation/presentation of the new network. Of course, a good communication/presentation of the network is always important and necessary, but it won't be the deciding factor. In short, I believe that, the way things are currently structured, with non-commercial social networks without the possibility of advertising to increase their visibility and their “symbolic value”, the decision to start using them – once someone knows about them and understands how they work – tends to be an easy and spontaneous move when the person has a certain profile – and very unlikely if the person doesn't have this profile. So, you could say, non-commercial social networks are not for everyone these days – or, not everyone is “compatible” with non-commercial social networks these days.

Suggested moves to try to bring friends to a non-commercial social network

Despite the (possible) scenario we've just described, there's nothing to stop you, of course, from trying to bring your friends and other people into non-commercial social networks. After all, there may be someone (or some people) among your friends and acquaintances with a profile that is “compatible” with non-commercial social networks.

Here are some suggested moves to do that:

[Jan. 22, 2024]

Updated: Aug. 02, 2024

CC BY-NC-ND 4.0 2024 Ink on Paper