Exit highway to hell

I admit I have lived in a digital cave over the past four years — because isn't that how platitudinous-terrorists live in the real world? Four years ago I decided I'll completely strip Amazon, Apple, Facebook, Google & Microsoft from my life in order to regain (some perceived) privacy. This came at the cost of becoming more than just “kind of lonely”, but with the great benefit of calmer information consumption and other life lessons. However, a couple of weeks ago, I realized that I should diverge a little from my loner path and try engaging with other humans who have similar struggles and perspectives in life as me. This change was fully triggered by Ludic's viral blog post about the current ridiculous AI hype. His blog post follows the “The Emperor's New Clothes” tradition of exposing a mass-deception and is certainly worth reading. It led me into signing up to Mastodon and starting this very blog, which will hopefully create a long-term improvement in my and others' life quality.

So here I am! With excitement and enthusiasm, I jump right into social media and engage with all kinds of people, enjoying reading others' opinions and points of view on a claviature of topics. (Which by the way are really one-sided interactions as I barely get responses so far, but that should eventually change.) But, then, there is this one phrase that was always bugging me in the past and is annoyingly popping up over and over again. Just like a god-damn mosquito that you can't find, but hear it mocking you while constantly circling your head bringing your blood to boiling and making your head turn red as it shows the over-pressurization of your veins slowly bringing you into the state of a mental break-down because you just f##king want to sleep as you have an important early appointment tomorr…AARRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Yeah … probably you know that feeling? It is this sloppy “contact your local political representative” that is absent-mindedly dropped by f##ucktards all over the web when policies are discussed causing this slightest of rage within me. Additionally, it is often the same kind of people who educate others on privileges. I believe that means it is now on me to teach all of you a lesson! Yes, including you, as you likely have recommended it too at some point. This is a necessity, my new purpose in life, and I swore to everything I care about to not crawl back into my digital cave before I have cleansed the web of people like you! No, I won't enjoy doing this, and please stop looking at me like a cute little baby seal, it won't save you any more! Even you know that eradicating your ignorance from this universe is a selfless service to humanity! As you have ignited my inner flame of terrorism, it has developed into a ferocious inferno, destroying us all!

Did you ever have just the faintest hunch that a political representative could be a luxury most people in the world don't possess¹? I assume if you never had that thought, most probably you have also not scratched the notion that criticizing or mere contacting a local “representative” can end deadly for many poor souls²? Also, not? So, are you realizing now that severing off your hands and tongue with a glowing rod of chromium³ is only quid pro quo to what you have done? I dearly hope that people reading your well intended “advice” were not as dimwitted as you and thought twice about actually following it. I believe catching every single person who has ever said this will be a Herculean task, but be certain I will at least get you! And everyone will shudder in terror when they hear your screams of agony as I unleash my wrath onto you! To all people reading this who have not yet committed this wicked sin: do not! It is not worth the fear you will face. Think clearly beforehand, “Would this really be a good advice?” After that, think again. Only in cases you are absolutely certain about where the person is coming from, and this advice has actual validity, you may express it with a huge disclaimer highlighting the possible side effects for everyone else.

Let's be real though and let the devilish atmosphere of the previous paragraph clear up for a bit. For all people living in some shape of democracy: How often has contacting your local representative really changed a fundamental issue? I have been active in politics in an advanced European democracy, so I know what having a local representative means. I also personally know several who chose this career. Actually, I was thinking following that path as well, until others on the same track as me started chit-chatting that “I am taking the issues our society has too seriously”. I am trying to make the point, that political representatives are just people, and, I called it career, because it is plainly their job. When they aren't in the spotlight, most don't give any s##t about issues, but their very own. The majority doesn't think about how they can solve others' problems, but what they need to do to keep their jobs or get a “promotion”. The same way as everyone who wants to preserve or “improve” their way of life. Many folks reading this might object with “but this politician XYZ actually cares”. My response then usually is: maybe they really do, but how can you be certain that isn't just their carefully crafted image? And even if your example really is one of these few who made helping others their life mission — they are an absolute minority, as most altruists plainly don't join this “industry”. It is an issue inherently to human nature. We don't do what is “good” because it is the “right thing” to do. We do what our peers do, we do what our “bubble” does, and ultimately we do what the people we are accountable to want from us. In the case of a politician, this is not the voter. Only in the utopian most perfect democracy with completely unbiased humans that can be the case. In reality, it's always some power-groups that are different in every country, but all share holding some gatekeeper position within their society. However, as a worthwhile blog post should offer some kind of answers and not purified despair, I'll tell you a short story about one of my relatives. They are true altruists and dedicated their life to being social worker, as which they regularly need help from their local political representatives (e.g. to prevent eviction or cutting of power supply of some unfortunate citizens, etc.). My relative was frustrated for a long time as they couldn't make those political representatives listen, so they became infamous for making a huge fuss in politicians' offices with screaming and channelling all their anger right at them. This reputation truly helped, and since then everyone answers their calls as all try preventing my relative visiting their offices again. This is the only example of “contact your local political representative” I have seen to work to some extent. Unfortunately, this needs to have a huge, big disclaimer: Once too many people do this, political representatives won't allow anyone coming to their offices any longer and isolate themselves even more from the “commoners”. So this can only be a tool of very last resort. And, do not try this in your country as where I am from we have a very low power distance⁴. In other countries, that might have been the last time you said anything.

Which would also hold true if you already forgot my previous warning! I swear I will find you and I will destroy everything dear to you! Your suffering will be unfathomable, and begging for mercy will inevitably lead to more torture! There is no hiding, nor hope. In my digital cave, you are all alone. No one can help you and no one can ease your suffering.

____ Notes: ¹ see several indices trying measuring this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Democracy_indices ² see the unfortunately common practice of repression: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_repression ³ Chromium because it is a metal with a very high melting point so it slices through your extremities like butter as you should be the only one breaking a sweat here. Besides, I'd personally enjoy it more if my tool of destruction shares its name with something I despise. *evil laughter* ⁴ power distance is a concept from sociology trying measuring how accepted inequalities of power are in societies; it is a typical “soft science”, so take with two grains of salt;

You don't know me, and I don't know any more about you than you shared on ludic.mataroa.blog. From reading your blog (let's stay true: totally binging all your posts in a day) I can as well assume we are geographically almost as distant as a sphere permits and have quite different backgrounds and origins. Despite all what separates us, I feel the strong urge to call you my brother (not in the Cain and Able way!). I am a single child, so I am not sure if that is the most accurate description of my feelings, but for the lack of a better phrase, I'll use it for now. Let me give you some background on where these strong emotions come from: I have called my blog “Exit highway from hell” because I have been travelling that road for way too long. Not because I have been struck by disasters or have an objectively bad live — certainly not. Actually, my neighbour says “I am winning in life” and from seeing many places, I know that > 80% of humans would kill to have a life like mine. However, as always, of course, that isn't enough for individuals of our species. Usually people would then say crap such as: “I'd feel way better if I had that promotion/yacht/penthouse/car/*insert other excrements.”, not me though. What I lack can't be bought or worked for. What I am longing for is not of the materialistic kind — unfortunately. Not being able satisfying my hunger led to taking truck loads of antidepressants for many years and likely many more to come. … I realize I am beating around the bush … what I am trying to say is: I feel lonely. Not in the traditional way, though! More like Will Smith in the film “I am legend” or Robinson Crusoe — as if I am the only person alive within my accessible environment. Or using your words: I am the only not cosplaying person I know of. All this has changed when I stumbled upon this post in a German newspaper's comment section, linking your recent AI rant. Since that day, my world has been piledriven (what actually is the correct passive form of to piledrive?). I still can't fully cope with the discovery of your blog. I actually had — kind of — accepted my faith of being the only non-cosplaying person I know of. Honestly, it makes me feel uneasy and causes discomfort to have my world crushed suddenly. On the other hand, it also gives me hope that I might one day have sincere friendship again. After all, if I was able to find one like-minded being, I should be able to find more. I am sure there are other people who feel startled by discovering your blog and are in similar need as me. I am certainly not a religious person, but the analogy of the Star of Bethlehem comes to mind here. If I start following that bright light in the sky (which after 2000 years turned to “that blog on the internet”) I will eventually find other folks who are as desperate and in search of the same as me — I'll just skip the last part with the saviour and founding a religion thing. From this, you can see how you have become a spark of hope for me. A beacon I might be able to follow, guiding me to my highway's next exit. I sincerely wish it to be possible, even though I am not sure yet how to actually accomplish it. Every journey requires its first step, though, and writing this letter to you is the first step I take. Thank you and hopefully see you along the way!

P.S.: Hopefully I was somewhat able to explain my situation in those ~600 words. I read them a few times now and don't feel like I have expressed my self properly (especially on the gratitude I feel towards Ludic). Instead, I made too many wordplays and started on too many ideas that now seem like loose strings. I guess that “style” is just to make me feel smart, but is actually counterproductive to what this post should achieve. I might write a V2 at one point, but for now I just want this to be posted so the journey actually starts.