The Dream Diary

In this dream I was in my house, and what I do is whenever I drink water, I always put the empty glass on the refrigerator so I can use it again.

So in the dream, I was going to drink a glass of water, and as soon as I took that empty glass, I saw that there was a black worm roaming inside it, with a red aura underneath.

In another dream which came to me after this one, I was making tea as usual for me and my parents. When I passed the cup of tea to my mom, I saw this black worm coming out of the tea and swimming to the area near my mother’s side, then swimming back to me and getting into my skin.

That worm was not long, but thick in the middle, with an upward curve in the center. It had a shape like this ()—like a kite but with smooth edges. It also had small legs like a frog and no eyes.

In this dream I was in a place, and a black van was in front of me. From that black van, two cows slid on a grass slider in front of me.

Then I said to the guy, whom I did not see, “What about the male cows? They would burn their feet.”

Out of nowhere, a black cow appeared, and the background shifted to a green area. Nothing was there, and the feet of that black male cow were burning.

In this dream, I was in a black car with the girl from my Love That Hurt blog. I was driving down a road covered with green trees on both sides when suddenly we crashed. I don’t know why it happened. I looked outside through the mirror, and it was dark. When I turned to face her, she was full of sweat, breathing deeply. I said to her, “We have to wait till it’s day so I can repair the car.” She blamed me, saying, “It all happened because of you.” I told her we needed to sleep and close the lights because there could be animals outside.

I offered her three options for sleeping arrangements, emphasizing that my sleep was important for our survival:

1. I sleep on the back seat while she sleeps in the front.

2. She sleeps on the back floor while I sleep on the back seat.

3. We both sleep on the back seat, with her on top of me.

She replied that she would sleep on the floor. I started removing my clothes until I was in my underwear, which was the same color as the accent color I used in my NixOS GNOME setup.

As we slept, I noticed she was shivering. I took her onto me, and we fell asleep together. Then, I slipped into a dream within the dream. In this inner dream, I was gripping the back seat with both hands, looking at her and saying, “What would happen if I rape you right now? Who is here to save you?” She was crying, but I said, “If I’m not doing anything, then what’s your problem with me?” Then we started kissing, passionately, over and over. We got naked, and she was on the back seat. I was fucking her, our bodies pressed together on the seat. I hugged her tightly and started fucking as hard and fast as I could. She began screaming.

Suddenly, the scene shifted within this inner dream. She was on top of me, sleeping, then woke up and kissed me. Her hair kept getting in the way, so I rolled it up in my hand, and we kissed heavenly, over and over. The moment felt intense. Then, I was on top of her, sucking her right boob. I could feel a strange sensation, like some liquid going through a pipe, a type of pain, but I got nothing from it. I tried the next one, and she was in pain, pushing me away. I put my hand on her mouth, trying as hard as I could, despite her resistance.

Abruptly, I was out of the inner dream. Back in the main dream, she woke up on top of me, shouting, “Who told you to do it? I am shit!” and other things. I was outside, fixing the car, and it was daytime. The jungle around us looked straight out of The Walking Dead series, with brown, crunchy leaves scattered everywhere—eerie and desolate. Then the dream broke, and I woke up.

This dream started with me at a house which was not mine, but in the dream I knew it was mine. I saw a lady and a kid (boy) going outside. As soon as I took a step outside the door, I was teleported to jail, and I got this info automatically in my mind that they were my wife and kid.

Then somehow I was outside of jail, and the next second I was in front of a building. There was no elevator in the building, so after a VERY LONG staircase I stopped in front of a house. Then I was teleported to a room where it was the kid and me, and I gave that kid a present. He was happy, but out of nowhere that lady (I think) grabbed my collar from behind, and the next second I was on a staircase crying with laughter—the same laugh I do in real life to decrease my anger or when I can’t break or hit someone. But while I was doing it in the dream, I felt nothing. There was no anger, just refreshment.

Then I stood up and started walking downwards. At one point there was a group of 4 people (3 boys, 1 girl). One of the boys came to me and offered me a taco from a silver tray full of tacos, which I refused by waving my hand and moved forward.

Before the end of the staircase, at the 2nd floor, I met my uncle who had a green Uber bag with not-so-familiar font. He said something, but I forgot. As soon as I touched the ground I was outside of a park which exists in real life—and then I woke up.

When I woke up it was refreshing. Nothing was in my mind, and the memory of the dream was fading away while I was trying to remember it.

Things I observed after I woke up
1. This dream came from my fear of becoming like my father
2. I knew every single character in this dream
3. I knew the building
4. My uncle is basically like an Uber food delivery guy (moving presents and food from one house to another)
5. The end of the staircase was made of metal, like the floor of a school bus with the same pattern
6. The only time I had tacos were after a fest in college in burger king

In this dream I was in a house which was not mine, possibly from a movie. I was coming towards this girl whose face I don’t remember anymore.

There was this white door with 4 mirrors separated by a “+” behind the stairs, and in front was a round table. Everything was decorated in white.

Suddenly the door started busting. I was going towards the door and saw 3 children in the dark outside wearing yellow shirts and sandy half jeans. They were smiling.

Then I saw a black revolver on the head of 1 child from the right, and the guy shot 3 bullet through 3 heads.

I ran to open the door but there was nothing. While I was looking, I saw green grass, a lamp, and another house—while listening to this high-pitch scream which woke me up.

So this dream came long after this incident that happened in my Taekwondo academy. It was almost 2 months after joining, and I had a crush on one of the coach’s daughters who used to replace him while he taught somewhere else. She was very cute and beautiful.

That day I was going to pay the fee, so I asked one of the girls there who I should give the money to, and the girl replied with – “do you think didi is a small girl?” (in my language). I said yes, thinking she was talking about the age. Then I gave the fee and left.

But the next day she also started staring at me.

I thought, am I being creepy? because I almost had my eyes on her. But suddenly she grouped everybody and screamed at me with stuff like “do you think I am small? This is how you respect your teachers?” etc.

At that time I got that guilty thing inside my throat while I was trying hard not to cry, and I could hear my heart beating in my ears. Everything went silent.

And because I fear stages, my body started to shake since everyone was looking at me. But I controlled myself.

Afterwards at night, her father called me and said – “did you say she is a small girl? I thought you are a silent, shy guy but you are a bomb.” Also with other non-important stuff, he said that I made her cry.

That hurt a lot.

After that call, a few days later, I left the academy. Not because I was feeling bad, but because I felt left out and no one was really talking to me anymore, which felt like shit.

Now in the dream: I was sleeping on the bed, she came on me. I couldn’t move for some reason, and she started strangling me with her hands while screaming. (High-pitch screams make me angry.)

And then I woke up.

That was the whole dream.

For some reason I don’t remember the dream where my physical IRL body moves, but I notice my movement when I am seeing the dream as well as when I am half awake and half asleep. Also, sometimes I can hear the outside sounds in my dream. Sometimes that outside sound integrates with the dream, like that one time I was asleep in the sleep and an alarm clock (red color) which I do not have IRL started making the same sound my Android clock makes. I woke up from sleep, looked at that alarm clock, and woke up again. And sometimes the noise IRL is so powerful that I break free from the dream. I remember it, but it starts to fade away while I’m waking up.

Well, till now the movement I had in my body were:

1. Movement of thumb or index finger / both upside down or reverse — maybe due to I watch a LOT of Instagram reels (mainly left hand).

2. Movement of whole body like a flick.

3. Movement of right leg like a flick.

4. Movement of right hand thumb in a circle. It can be because of Android games, but I use the right thumb for shooting and left for movement.

So before this dream I had a French poem recitation in front of the class when I was in 5th, I think. And like everybody, I did not know shit. Also, I had stage fear (still have). So for the whole day, I was just repeating it, but it was not going into my mind. Eventually, I was fed up and decided to sleep at night. And in my dream, I was reciting it again and again and again. No one was in my house and I didn’t even notice that. I also didn’t notice I was in a dream.

When I woke up and started to bathe, I suddenly got this whole poem in my head like it was glued to every cell of my brain, and I was very happy. But for some reason, I forgot the poem and started reciting a broken poem when I actually started speaking. And when I got home, I got it again on my tongue.

Like this, in this dream I was reciting this big-ass answer of a history question repeatedly, which I was reciting in real life the day before the exam. But not like the previous case—I was able to write that shit in the exam alphabet by alphabet.

Note – In both of the dreams above I was walking the whole time while reciting. And IRL I usually walk while reading or repeating repeatedly.

Another dream was of this tool I was working on. I got stuck on a problem while coding, but somehow after I completed one of the best sleeps I ever had, my mind was empty and fresh, and I had the solution for the problem.

So before the dream, I would like to tell you that I used to go for tuitions for maths when I was in school. If I moved forward, there was a house, and at that house lived my crush — she was a hairy stick, but I liked her. Going further ahead, there was a grocery shop run by the mother of the tutor.

Now in this dream, I looked up and saw this building — just this one yellow-white building — which was at the right side of my crush’s house if my back was facing her house. Until that day, I had been going back and forth and never really looked at that building. But on that fine evening, I think it was 6:00 pm, I was going to the shop to buy something. While returning, I thought of taking that short route, but then to feel the weather I looked up — and I got a déjà vu. I was standing at the same spot, same building, same colors.

And the best part — I suddenly remembered that the weather in my dream was the same weather right now. For some reason, it calmed my mind, and I felt relaxed, like I had gotten the answer to a very tough question.